


A Demon and a Grim Reaper go to a bar...

by Fishpaste



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Drinking, Gen, Minor Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-19
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-10-12 22:59:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17476574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fishpaste/pseuds/Fishpaste
Summary: Who would have thought that he'd actually have something in common with the red headed lunatic? And it would be that of all things...





	A Demon and a Grim Reaper go to a bar...

‘I thought you were coming alone!’

The balding, red faced man looked torn between either panicking over the new circumstance or becoming angry at the unexpected change in circumstance. Sebastian could well imagine the sneer of Ciel’s face as he replied.

‘Ah yes, your “friend” truly expected me to come and meet him in the middle of London, at dead on midnight’ –Sebastian almost smirked at the disgust in his Master’s tone there, Ciel had not been impressed with the melodrama of the invitation in the least – ‘without any form of either support or supervision. He is a bigger fool than I expected.’

‘He will speak to only the Earl of Phantomhive, there is no one else he can trust!’ exclaimed the portly man, practically throwing his hands up in agony. ‘My Lord, you may have destroyed any hope you could possibly have had at receiving the vital information!’

Ciel paused for a moment, just long enough to emphasise how utterly ridiculous this whole charade was. A midnight appointment at an anonymous hotel, “come alone at midnight”, hints at deadly secrets...honestly, if he didn’t know better he would swear that the Viscount was involved. Why her Majesty thought sending him on this wild goose chase was a good idea was beyond him, what did he care if bloody horses of all things were being stolen? Oh all right, they were racehorses, worth enormous fortunes and all that, but surely he had better things to do with his time? Apparently not it seemed, and like the loyal dog he was, he was dutifully following up every last thread in this case, including this pathetic farce of a meeting.

‘Sebastian will remain down here.’ He said shortly. ‘I alone will come up and see this so called “vital informer” of yours. If, and only if, his information is of any use to my investigation then Sebastian will pay you once we leave the hotel. That should suffice for everyone’s paranoia should it not?’ and he smiled one of those smiles which contained absolutely no mirth or human emotion at all.

‘My Lord?’ Sebastian enquired. They really knew nothing about the person currently waiting on them, was it wise to have Ciel go up alone?

‘Wait down here Sebastian. If I need you I’ll call.’ 

‘Very good Master.’

The portly man looked torn, a reminder of his money had sparked that predictable rush of greed through a human’s eyes, and well, Ciel hardly looked threatening. A hint of smile crossed the butler’s face, he didn’t need to look threatening, he held all the power anyway and a single word would unleash it all upon whomever he chose.

‘Oh...oh all right. If you’ll follow me this way then my Lord.” He snapped, nervousness giving way to irritation now. Sebastian stepped back compliantly, though he amused himself by glaring at the stranger, allowing just a hint of fang to show. Annoyance melted back into fear and the man practically ran into the elevator, with a bored looking Ciel following behind. As the doors shut Sebastian looked around, wondering what to do while he waited. While of course he was perfectly capable of standing here until he was either called or the Earl returned, that might attract attention, and a good butler was always discreet and unobtrusive. Sadly this didn’t seem a likely location to find a cat and so the demon currently wearing the form of a smart and dignified butler looked around his location with a calculating eye. 

Several chairs were gathered around an over large fireplace, and were occupied by a small army of elderly ladies, all with knitting needles flashing like knives and pursed lips moving in a constant stream of gossip and chatter. Sebastian felt his lip curl, just a little, they looked like a group of turkeys there with beady eyes staring avidly at all who went past while withered old hands jerked wool into new forms. Dismissing them as a possibility he looked towards the front desk. The receptionist sitting there was small, blonde and looked bored. There was potential for entertainment there...but again, it would hardly be discreet to abscond with someone who was currently working. Besides, he didn’t want to have to extract himself from any situations if his Master called him. So no, the receptionist was also dismissed. As was the restaurant, human food always tasted odd to Sebastian, and it was hardly as though he needed the sustenance. That left the bar, and as he cast dark red eyes over that area, something caught his attention.

Flame red hair, trailing indecently far down the owners back, a laugh that was rather too loud and full of emotion for a stuffy Victorian society, hands gesturing in manners that drew far more attention to themselves than would ever be considered proper. Sebastian raised an eyebrow, now this was something he honestly hadn’t expected. His first response was to consider if this meant danger for the young Master. A Reaper being present meant somebody was sure to die soon; but equally it didn’t necessarily have anything to do with their current case, perhaps a guest was due a fatal heart attack or bout of pneumonia. If Ciel was in danger then Sebastian could be at his side in less than a second, regardless of the three levels and multiple locked doors between them. Rather than alarm his Master, or interrupt the potentially vital meeting he was currently engaged in Sebastian decided to find out for himself just why the Reaper was here. Besides, he needed something to do, and this might prove entertaining.

Walking towards the bar he noticed an impressive array of bottles and glasses in front of the red head. Quite enough to leave a normal human paralysed with alcohol. This just got more and more interesting. He kept his approach silent, not wanting to give away any advantage, although considering the state the other was probably in he could have brought a brass band to announce his arrival and not been regarded.

‘Hello Bassie darling!’

Sebastian looked up, realising that the strategically placed bottle in front of the reaper was perfectly reflecting his silent approach. He smiled, good, games like these were no fun with a substandard player. 

‘Grell Sutcliff.’

For once the Reaper was not making any move to turn and fling themselves at him, either in wild passion or in hope of a fight to the death. It seemed that enough alcohol could have some effect on a divine being after all, who knew?

‘And what brings such a beautiful man as yourself here tonight? Oh, come on, you can say it, you were out searching for me weren’t you! Fate has conspired to bring up together once more! Our love can no longer be denied! Waiter, a drink for my friend!’ They called imperiously.

The waiter who brought Sebastian a glass of some clear liquid looked appropriately traumatised for someone who had just been forced to spend time in the company of the most notorious reaper around.

‘Hardly. In fact I was about to ask you the same question. I didn’t think drinking on duty was permitted.’

‘And now you sound like Will, bring my two favourite boys together!’ Grell beamed as Sebastian sat down next to them. The reaper immediately leaned forward, trying to drape themselves across the demon but being foiled by the distance between their stools.

‘If he were here I doubt we’d be calmly sitting together.’

‘No...he really doesn’t like you. But anyway, not even Will can tell me off this time, I’m off duty!’ Grell said proudly, lifting another drink with their hand shaking very slightly.

‘Off duty and still in the human world, visible no less!’ Sebastian smirked. ‘Surely you’re not trying to get back on suspension are you?’

‘Ha! No thank you, once was quite enough. But what are you doing here, off the leash for once?’

‘Alas no, my Lord is currently busy and I am awaiting his return.’

‘So you came to socialise with me! Oh what a charming man you are Bassie!’

‘I came to see if you were up to anything that could affect our investigation.’ He corrected, sipping more at his drink, it wasn’t too bad actually.

‘Oh well, I’m not of any help with that I’m afraid, but if you’re searching for other entertainment...’ Grell leered.

‘I find myself more in search of answers than anything like that. Just why are you here?’

The red haired reaper sighed, running a hand down their face and suddenly looking a lot more tired than teasing.

‘Trying to drink to forget, only it’s a lot harder nowadays than it used to be.’

‘Oh? Forget what exactly?’ Sebastian asked, intrigued now. Grell could be a pest, an utter nightmare who was generally far too loud, obnoxious and with a tendency to try and maul him whenever they got the chance, but Sebastian had never really held a grudge or disliked the other. At least they were rarely boring and didn’t either cower or despise him. Both those reactions were so predictable as to be tedious.

‘Forget stupid, ridiculous, annoying, damn kids.’ Grell practically growled, their permanent good humour melting off their face as they grabbed their glass and finished off the last of their drink as though it had personally offended them.

‘Children? What experience do you have of children?’ Sebastian asked, rather astonished, it seemed as though Sutcliff was full of surprises today.

‘Alright, I suppose he’s not technically a child, but he certainly acts like one. Arrogant idiotic child.’ They sighed, the anger draining away again as they tried to refill their glass. Sebastian smoothly took the bottle from a trembling hand and topped up the glass.

‘You’re not making too much sense.’ He said calmly. Grell snorted, sipping from the newly filled drink.

‘Not with this much drink inside me I hope.’ He paused a moment and then burst out again. ‘Why do they think they’re invincible? I mean, just because they know you’ll come and rescue them from whatever situation they’ve ended up in, they treat it like licence to throw themselves heedlessly into danger!’

Sebastian sat back, bizarrely, he could rather relate to this, his mind supplied him all too readily with occasions where Ciel had used his knowledge that Sebastian would come and rescue him from anything, as an excuse to blindly charge ahead into dangerous situations. But Grell was still talking.

‘And they never seem to grasp the idea that if they just bloody slowed down for a few moments, looked at the situation and didn’t just leap straight into the fray then it might be simpler.’

‘I find myself having to agree with you.’ Sebastian said thoughtfully, taking another drink. ‘While flattering, the blind faith placed in a rescuer is often that; blind.’

‘I know!’ Grell exclaimed, leaning further forward and nearly falling out of their stool. ‘And then when you do actually rescue them, because of course you do, being an amazing awesome and gorgeous Reaper, and that just teaches them to do it even more.’

‘Indeed, I am beginning to believe the Master actually enjoys a last minute rescue from peril.’

‘But they’ll never listen when you try to tell them how to avoid it will they? Even when they acknowledge that you might possibly know what you’re talking about.’

‘Goes without saying.’ Sebastian said, an actual smile stretching across his face. Surprised he looked down to see a fair collection of glasses had mysteriously accumulated in front of him, oh dear, how much had he had to drink? Well, it wasn’t like he could really get drunk, a little tipsy perhaps...his Master still hadn’t called him, and he didn’t seem to be in any distress or discomfort either, so Sebastian shrugged it off and refocused back on the conversation, where Grell was complaining about how they only listened when they wanted to.

‘And then! And then they actually get rewarded for the stupid thing!’ Grell continued indignantly. ‘I mean, that’s only gonna teach ‘em to do it more! An’ I’ll only have to be the one to drag them back out of the mess again.’

‘They never do seem to grasp the concept that getting shot still hurts, even if it doesn’t wound you.’ Sebastian said, Grell nodding in empathetic agreement.

‘Yeah, and that just because they didn’t get hurt, doesn’t mean you might not need a break before being dragged off again.’

‘Absolutely.’

‘I mean, Knox...he’s a great junior, don’t get me wrong there... s’just he still thinks he’s bloody invincible. Renegade Reaper...y’know...attacks buncha humans...kid just jumps straight in there...no plan, no fore-forth-thinking ahead.’ The reaper blinked drowsily at the demon, words beginning to slur a lot more now. ‘Didn’t even wait f’me to get there...hadta save him. An’ then Will goes an tells him he dida good job...just ‘cause he saved some humans. I mean, what’s a human’s life? S’not like they won’t die inna bit anyway. But no, Knox is a bloody hero an’ won’t learn a thing an’ is gonna put himself in even more danger and I’m gonna hafta pull him out again and if I’m not fast enough next time? What’s he going to do then?’

‘Regret it possibly. Or you’ll just have to go to even further lengths to keep them alive. Which is my goal admittedly, but if the young Master could learn a little discretion and stop relying on the demon up his sleeve to always come to the rescue in the nick of time, I can’t say that I would be unappreciative.’

‘Ha...’ Grell chuckled weakly, head dropping down on the table. “Stupid kids...good kid though...told him m’proud...prob’ly a bad idea...’ They fell quiet, breathing patterns changing as they slipped into sleep.

Sebastian sat still for a minute, feeling the unfamiliar light-headedness that came with a lot of alcohol. The Reaper must have been even drunker than he’d realised, to lower their defences to this degree in the presence of an undoubted enemy. He debated on attacking her, after all, the Master had told him to capture Jack the Ripper...but that case had been closed for a while now, and Ciel had accepted the reaper’s presence at other times, despite the murder of his aunt. Sebastian shrugged internally. Killing Grell would be pointless and would undoubtedly bring the reapers down on him, which sounded far more trouble than it was worth.

CIel still hadn’t called him, but the meeting would certainly be wrapping up soon. The butler stood up slowly from his stool, reaching into his pocket to pull out some money to cover both their drinks. He turned to walk away, before realising that leaving an incapacitated reaper here would probably lead to issues later; either by Grell waking up and accidently murdering someone, or somebody trying to take advantage of the strangely dressed crimson person and ending up regretting it. With a sigh, the butler easily lifted Grell into his arms, the slumbering reaper instinctively curling up closer to him.

The receptionist was amiable enough to sort him out a room, at least once Sebastian mentioned the Phantomhive name, and he easily carried the other up and placed him on the bed. Upstairs, he paused and looked down on Grell, sprawled across the covers. Ever the perfect butler, the demon pulled off the reapers shoes and coat and draped the coverlet over their body. He automatically blew out the candles and left the room, well, it was just what a butler did was it not? Besides, he almost felt he owed the Reaper something now, that had been a far more enjoyable wait for his Master than he had anticipated. He wouldn’t even object to similar circumstances happening again.

Back down in the reception, Sebastian reached the elevator, just as the doors swung open and a tired but thoughtful looking Ciel came out. Glancing at his pocket watch Sebastian noted it was nearly half past two in the morning, no wonder the young Master looked exhausted.

‘And did the meeting proceed as planned?’ He asked quietly, paying the now triumphant looking portly man who’d brought them to the informer.

‘It wasn’t entirely worthless I suppose.’ Ciel said irritably, clearly fighting the urge to yawn and rub his eyes. ‘Come then Sebastian, I find myself in dire need of some tea and sleep.’

‘Yes my Lord.’

He followed the small boy with the large responsibilities out into the dark once more, wondering what sort of peril they would be off to find next. Well, perhaps it would make an interesting story to tell Sutcliff the next time he saw them.


End file.
